In The Thick Of It

I’m having one of those days.

All I needed to do was reheat a bowl of soup for lunch.  We have been without a microwave for about a month, now, so heating anything is not quite as simple as it could be.  I dumped the leftovers into the small sauce pan, turned the burner on high and stepped away to check my email (of course.)  As I returned to the warmed soup, I became distracted by the phone, knocked the handle of the pan and proceeded to dump soup all over me, the counter, the floor, and of course the burning hot stove-top.  I was in the thick of it.  “It can’t get any worse,” I thought.  Until the dog came to investigate and delivered sloppy, soupy footprints throughout the rest of the kitchen.

There I sat, right where I was, lost in the mess around me.  I couldn’t go back. I certainly, couldn’t stay there.  I could only go forward.

As I was checking-in on social media, still vaguely smelling like soup, I was reminded of similar feelings surrounding Nicholas’s surgery.  Having our third child was supposed to be pretty straight forward.  Until I was distracted by his heart defect.  I had worry, fear, and anxiety dumped all over me.  And there I sat.  I sat there for quite a while.  I wanted to go back – it wasn’t supposed to happen this way.  But, I couldn’t.  So, I sat there some more, right in the thick of it. Until, I was strong enough to go forward.

Besides the frustration of a very, very messy lunch, my heart aches today for the countless people who are still in the thick of it.  My heart is breaking for those who are saying good-bye. I am worried along side those who are awaiting answers. And, I find hope in those who are starting to take steps forward, finding the strength to emerge – from the thick of it.

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Amy is the Director of Programs for the Conquering CHD. She is the mother of three including Nicholas who is now 9.

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